By The Pool with AJ & Hi Kix
Here's another blast from the past - a short KAK piece featuring AJ & Hi Kix.
By the Pool
The sun was baking as AJ lay on the sun lounger next to the pool, her body encased in the white two-piece bikini that she’d bought from Donnatella for more money than she cared to think about. She reached over and picked up the sun cream, squirting the fluid onto her hand before rubbing it into her legs. AJ took a moment to admire the five-inch high-heeled strappy sandals that she’d picked up in Italy at the same time as the bikini. Not her usual choice of footwear, but she’d gambled that they’d be more appropriate for her particular need today.
Returning the sun cream to her bag, AJ plucked out a bottle of water from it and took a long drink. She was surprised by the fact that it was still cold after being in the Spanish sun for over an hour – apparently the bag did everything that HQ said it would do. She glanced across at the villa; a pristine white affair that seemed to be indistinguishable from all the others in this area of Spain, except for the presence of the heavily armed guards. As she leaned back again, two shadows crossed over her lounger, right on cue.
“Do you mind?” AJ asked indignantly. “You’re standing in my sunlight.”
“Excuse me miss,” the accent was English definitely – South London maybe? – AJ thought to herself as she looked up at the two figures standing over her, shielding her eyes. The two men were equally generic looking – one had blonde hair, the other brown. Both of them were wearing cheap suits – probably made of polyester, which would explain why they were sweating profusely. “But this is private property.”
“Really?” AJ’s coy reply matched her innocent expression on her face. “But the guy at the gatehouse said it would be fine for me to come up and use the pool.” She pointed towards the gatehouse, some fifty yards away. Both of the Rent-A-Cops looked across – and saw their bruised and battered colleague tied to a chair with a pair of socks shoved in his unconscious mouth.
Confusion swept across both guard’s faces as they registered what they were seeing. They looked at each other for a moment before speaking.
“What happened to Dave?” The blonde guard asked.
“Me.” AJ answered as she stood up, spraying water into the face of the brown haired guard. As he staggered back for a moment she swung her fist backwards, catching the blonde guard on the chin and knocking him into the small table next to the sun lounger. Brown haired guard was just reaching inside his jacket when AJ’s right foot connected with his head, sending him sprawling to the floor and his gun to the bottom of the pool.
Blonde haired guard was charging towards AJ now – her sixth sense made her turn about at the right moment and he found himself running straight into her rapidly extending left leg. The high-heeled foot caught him perfectly, flooring him in an instant and removing him from the fight as he crashed to the stone surface.
Brown haired guard was getting to his feet again as AJ sauntered across to him. She grabbed the lapels of his jacket and pulled him to his feet. His eyes were rolling around as he was trying to comprehend just what had unfolded in the last thirty seconds.
“Aww, poor baby,” AJ said. “What’s the matter? Feeling abit light headed?” He nodded. “Maybe I can help you with that.” She followed it up by savagely head butting him, knocking him to the floor. She dusted her hands off before returning to the sun lounger. Before she resumed her sunbathing she looked at her watch.
Oh good, she thought, Hi Kix should be in position now.
From inside the villa Agent Hi Kix had watched AJ take care of the external security exactly as they’d planned from a first floor window that overlooked the pool. AJ’s role on this job was easy – distract the guards outside and allow Hi Kix the opportunity to get in and grab the flash drive they were after. She had to admit that she’d been envious of AJ’s choice of swimwear – however, Hi Kix was wearing her trusty catsuit and boots so she wasn’t going to have to worry about any wardrobe malfunctions for her part of the operation.
The heels of her boots made a click-clack sound against the marble floors – hardly conducive to stealth, she muttered as she made her way through the building. As she turned on the first floor landing she found her path blocked by two more guards.
“Oh great,” Hi Kix said. “It’s Larry and Curly. Where’s Moe?” The guards looked at each other, completely failing to understand Hi Kix’s Three Stooges joke. Utter morons – no one appreciates the classics these days, she thought as she took advantage of their confusion, grabbing both men and smashing their heads together. As they stood their dazed, Hi Kix executed a cheerleader-style high kick from her boot to the chin of the left hand guard, sending him to the floor face first, then delivered a powerful roundhouse kick to the side of his companion’s head, knocking him out cold.
Taking a moment to admire her handiwork, she knelt down next to the barely-conscious guard and turned his head to face her.
“Okay pretty boy,” she said. “Are you going to tell me where I can find Stratton or do I have to really hurt you?” The guard pondered the question for several seconds before he mumbled something about the second floor. “Thanks.” Hi Kix answered before slugging him with a right hook.
True to the incapacitated guard’s word, Hi Kix found a small office on the second floor of the villa that was occupied by the person she was looking for:
Billionaire industrialist, renowned owner of the Global News Network and closet super villain, Lord Edward Stratton.
He was sitting behind a large oak desk, cigar in one hand and a glass of whiskey in the other as he twirled around his chair to see the catsuit-clad Agent Hi Kix. Stratton had a wide smile on his face.
“So good to see you again Agent Hi Kix,” Stratton gloated. “What’s it been now, three months since Paris?”
“I’m here for the flash drive your agent’s stole,” Hi Kix said. “If you just give it to me then there won’t be any need for me to deflate that ego of yours anymore than I absolutely have to.”
“Oh, I’d like to give it to you,” Stratton replied. “But not with the flash drive.” Hi Kix felt her stomach turn at his innuendo as she walked towards him. She hated his little piggy eyes and is wiry moustache, his terrible dress sense and his horrid shoes, but most of all, she hated his attitude towards her. “However, if you want it that desperately,” he reached for what appeared to be a walking stick, pulled it free and Hi Kix saw the blade of a sword cane glinting in the light. “You can fight me for it.”
“Okay, don’t say I didn’t warn you,” Hi Kix answered as she dodged the first sweeping arc of the lethal blade. She slammed her fist into Stratton’s sword arm, just above the elbow, hoping to jar the weapon free from his grasp. He retaliated by swinging the sword cane at her. Hi Kix’s faster reactions narrowly avoided the blade as it sliced through the air where her stomach had been moments before.
Stratton had left himself wide open – and Hi Kix took full advantage. She leapt forward, her boots slamming first into his chest, then his face, then followed up with a hard punch into Stratton’s nose. He staggered backwards, blood beginning to flow from the now obviously broken nose. As he stood there dazed, Hi Kix performed a standing backwards handspring, smashing both of her feet into his face. She landed neatly on her feet as Stratton collapsed to the floor, the sword cane clattering by his side.
Hi Kix sauntered across to him and knelt down by him.
“Now, I’ll ask again; where’s the flash drive?” He pointed to his desk. Hi Kix looked at it and saw the small pink device next to an ashtray. As she picked it up she saw Stratton lunge at her from the corner of her eye. Her hand snatched at the ashtray, and she smashed it across his head as he reached her. His unconscious body slumped to the floor. Hi Kix tutted.
“Didn’t you know that smoking is bad for your health?”
When she finally stepped back out into the warm Spanish afternoon air, Hi Kix could see AJ waiting for her by the gatehouse. She walked towards her, brandishing the flash drive in between her fingers.
“Here it is,” Hi Kix said.
“Any problems?” AJ asked.
“No, none at all,” Hi Kix replied as the two agents walked out of the villa complex. Hi Kix suddenly stopped in her tracks. “Hang on, what’s on this thing anyway?”
“Oh, it’s my holiday photos,” AJ said as she swiped it from Hi Kix’s hand. “Come on, we’d better get a move on, you know what The Body is like if she misses a workout in the gym.”
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